I was perusing Facebook this morning, checking up on my friends and what's happening in their lives and I came upon a cutting remark about me on another friend's FB page from an old comrade that I have drifted from over the years.
At first upon reading it I smiled, shrugged it off and merely let it run off my back, but then it began to stick in my side, as the enemy's attacks sometimes do (*for those of you who don't understand what i'm talking about and want an explanation just ask*). Being a Christian means you're faced with similar scenarios daily - you can lower yourself to it, get angry and deal with things in a bad way or you can rise to it, let Papa's grace take over and deal with things in a better way - it's a tough decision sometimes, sometimes just a natural gear you click into, I try my best nowadays to do the right thing by Papa and not so much by man anymore.
Anyhoo, in the remarks about me I was called a "megalomaniac" - hmmm, I am many, many things, but that hadn't registered on my personal radar of self awareness, however if I am perceived as that by others I would genuinely be interested to know so I can ask Papa about it.
My journey with Papa was also belittled in a round about way (which I get every now and then, but not very often and usually by people who know very little about Him and me). I deal with it ok most of the time - Jesus faced the same kinda stuff, so I'm in the best company. It did strike me, however, that a lot of people have a lot of misconceptions of "Christians", "Christianity" and what it is to be a Christian generally and these are made, most of the time, without the key ingredients - knowledge of the subject matter and, most importantly, experience of the subject matter.
I am so very lucky that I came to find my faith in a very relaxed way and without any "religious baggage" that sometimes comes with faiths. So sometimes when people learn that I'm a Christian they say"I didn't know you're religious..." and I say "Ha!, ahm not, but ah do have faith" - faith and religion are two very different things. I'm not gonna go into it here as it would digress and move off-point, but I will explain it, as I see it, to anyone asks about it privately. This guy, however, explains it pretty well: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IAhDGYlpqY
I started going to church with Linette, my wife, when we started seeing each other 'cause I'd always had a healthy respect for "the big man" as I put it and I have always been, I think, fairly broad minded. So I sat at the back of the church taking in everything I saw and heard and didn't, for the most part, take part in anything for around 8 months, just sat there listening... I hadn't made up my mind on matters and didn't want to be a hypocrite, singing and praying when I didn't 100% know what was going on, but after I "heard from God" via some amazingly prophetic people I began to lower my defences to Him and then I "experienced" Him and His love for me. I won't go into my experiences here, I don't need to but again, I will to anyone asks about it privately.
What's he on about? - simply this - if you've never "experienced" God's love in person and I mean really felt His presence around you then you don't know anything about Him, regardless of any intellectual books you might have read or whatever you might have picked up through the modern-day 'Tower of Babel' that is the internet.
Unlike others (non-Christian and, to be honest, some Christians too) I won't belittle you or judge you if you choose to be an atheist, muslim or new ager, etc. etc. etc., i'm not in a position to judge you and (in fairness) neither are you to judge me. I have friends who are some of those forementioned things, do I judge them? - nope. Do they judge me? - probably!, ha ha ha :-) but it's ok I can deal with it because I know when they rib me for my beliefs they don't actually do it with any real malice, it's done with a healthy and courteous respect for me - the same that I extend to them. However... if I get a sniff of real malice or even hatred for my personal beliefs I will shake the dust off my feet personally and see you later.
This brings me to another point - when I chose to become a Christian 95% of the people I knew before that went with it and simply seemed to have the "ok, the big man's changed track a little, but ees still switched oan an is still a gen guy" kind of attitude which I really appreciated and still do, more than you know. Unfortunately there was always going to be that small percentage of friends and family that simply didn't get it / hated it / belittled it just like Jesus Himself and this morning was one of those times when I felt the pain of that. It seems strange to me that those who were/are against my change of journey because I no longer go along with their way of thinking were amongst some of my nearest and dearest. I guess what it boils down to is that some folks don't like loosing "control" of others - that's not really love though, is it?
It was only after Lin prayed for me that I got the message clearly from Papa and it was something I knew, but this morning's attack had clouded my mind...He said "my son" - "MY SON" - it cleared my mind straight away.
For those of you who read this and who knew me before my decision of faith I need you to know that my identity is no longer the guy you knew. I am my Father's son, as are you His sons and daughters - except I really know it because I made the connection. My identity is in Him folks, not what circle or group I used to belong to. Who I used to be will always be a part of me, but who I am now matters to me more. I do not regret my decision of faith, indeed I fly my Father's colours from the mast proudly, but I do hope that you'll find that i'm not a megalomaniac, most definitely not "holier than thou" and that I'm still so down to earth that if you're a past friend that we can still share some quality banter and questionable humour.
;-)
If we don't journey onwards and upwards together I wish you well and hope that we will continue to be friends for a long time, but my future with my Father and my family is more important to me than my past.
Bless yees aw.
Alba, fo Dia, gu brath.
KEITH.
