Awrite troopsh?...
Good to feel hungry fir writin' again, courtesy o Papa G n some breakthrough I got on Friday night from him and my church family. This week has been really tough for me - really tough. The enemy has been bombarding me continually with abuse and has been fairly relentless in his attacks.
If you didn't read my last blog, I mentioned how Andy at church had lead his sermon on how what the enemy really wants above all is the authority that Jesus gave us spiritually. Well, he took it upon himself that this week he was out to try and get mine. If you don't have a Scoobert de Doo what I'm on about try reading my last blog and if that doesn't explain it to your satisfaction let me know and I'll write to you personally and get you kitted out wi some info.
So, yeah, the enemy's being having a field day with me this week, so much so that by Friday I was feeling the old feelings that I used to feel when I suffered from depression around 5 years ago - not good. The enemy has been hitting me with "you don't contribute to your house", "you'll never get a job", "you're nothing but a house slave" - there were plenty more, I can assure you, but i'm sure you get the picture. Now, normally when these fiery darts come my way I clearly hear them coming in and just laugh at him and before long the attacks stop, but this week he sent his "apathetic fog", as I call it, ahead of him which attacks me in a s.a.s. stealth stylee and before I knew it I was struggling to fight him off and then he really started work on me - it was relentless and I didn't know how to fight back with these lying thoughts. You know what its like? - If you put a frog in hot water it will jump straight out, but if you put it in cold water and slowly heat the water it will stay in the hot water and boil to death - that's how lost I felt this week.
The enemy was attacking my manhood (no, not my twig n two berries - sheesh!) and by standing all over that he started to rob me of my authority - the b#####d. The worst part about it is that I came into agreement with a couple of things he had whispered about - that's the thing with him - there's always an element of truth in what he says, but he twists it and makes it contorted thus contorting you, if you let him - that's what happened to me. I've since apologised to my lord for agreeing with the enemy and will try my best in future not to agree with anything he says - it will be tough, but I'm gonna try - I have to - there's no way I'm gonna be his slave - no chance!
By Friday night I had had enough and decided to text some of my bros and sis's and ask for their prayers to help me, what a response I got! - thank you all. I felt something shift as Lin was praying for me and giving me good advice and with the awesome covering prayer that was coming my way courtesy of my church family. My bud John said I should go read Psalm 35 and gain strength from it so I got out my Message Bible and got flicking. What an awesome passage! - I read it out loud in bed before going to sleep as I felt that doing that would help and left my bible open at the pages overnight and for the first time in a while slept really soundly.
Since Friday night I've felt good and a lot more "back on track" within myself, i'm so thankful to my church family, not just because they helped me, but because I knew I could reach out to them for help. I wonder how many churches don't have that bond?... I love that feeling of unity at our church, it's just awesome. I remember one day Richard, our pastor, got us to stand together, put our right arm around the person next to us and our left arm on the person in front. We stood in a square like Romans in a defensive position, it felt brilliant - that's how I think we should be at church and on our journey with Papa - tight together and if someone goes down in battle the others should pick him/her up, put him/her back on his/her feet and get back on with the battle. I don't know if I could go to a church without that type of fellowship as it is invaluable to me.
The whole thing with attacks is that they should be a learning curve, if you don't learn from them then the enemy will get you in the same place and with the same tactic every time. With good advice from my Church Mum (Yolanda) and Church Aunt (Mariette) I hope I've learned a little better how to handle these attacks.
I hope that if my bros n sisters ever need my prayers then they'll know to ask me.
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Church was good this morning, Linette lead worship even though she was quite stressed, she hadn't had enough time to prepare properly due to art commissions and deadlines and wasn't looking forward to "winging it". Turns out she did fine and the worship was great. We did a couple of old school Christmas tunes this morning which went down as well as the excellent mince pies that were on offer. :-) It's always nice when someone like Sarah Mayers makes the worship team a cup of tea whilst we're rehearsing or setting up, God bless her servant heart, we never have enough time to rehearse everything and are usually running around trying to put chord sheets together or soundcheck so when someone asks "would you like a cup of tea?" it's like someone saying "would you like a shot in my jacuzzi?" - "Yes, PLEASE!!" :-)
Andy Hall was speaking again today - what an annointed guy, he's never boring and always gives food for thought. Andy spoke about Jesus this morning - and why not? - it's his birthday coming up soon in't it? ;-)
I learned a few new things about him this morning, about how he wouldn't have had long hair, like most people's (mine included) misconceptions, about how when he met with the spirits of Moses and Elijah on the mountain, that he wasn't asking for council or just having a nice con-flab between spiritual troopsh - what he was really saying was "thanks for leading the way boys, but I'll take it from here and what I say will be final" - ooft! - Jesus rocks man, what authority!! \,,/
The main thing I got from Andy's sermon was Jesus was and will forever be the best Christmas present EVER.
Be blessed in your spiritual authority guys, have a wonderful Christmas, with all its non-sensical trappings, but above all, please try and remember why it's called CHRISTmas, eh? :-)
Have a good one - K x \,,/
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